I Sit Here Alone

It's a weird day and a weird holiday. I'm sort of just sitting here, waiting for the mailman. Or waiting for it to be later when I have things I must do. The mailman may bring more cards. All the ones we've gotten so far I scattered around among our regular everyday tchotchkes in the living room. And, of course, I already scattered Christmas toys in the same spots. (That's Jack Skellington is from Nightmare Before Christmas so that counts, right?) I hope the mailman doesn't bring any cards that require that head-slapping "I shoulda sent them one" feeling because it's too late now, I think.

I went to my dad's today to get (yesterday's) mail in and today's newspaper. He had three Christmas cards but they were all from businesses. He also wanted me to empty the dishwasher. He had gotten it very full before using it. Good thing he has loads of dishes and flatware my mother left behind. My dad is ailing. We aren't sure why but he's in pain. The pain killers help but he doesn't feel like getting around much. He is making his own meals, though. But he's using a walker and that gives me pause.

Dad said he didn't need his shopping done for a 'day or two' but tomorrow is Christmas Eve so I peeked at his list. I went to a Randall's in his neighborhood and got a few things from the list (honey, bananas, dishwasher soap, eggs) concluding that I could provide other things from my larder (we buy giant things of raisins and cases of V8 juice at Costco and those were the other items). I bought him some new sponges, too.

I am going to make a Christmas Eve dinner early tomorrow evening. I doubt that my dad will feel like coming over but I'll deliver to him. I wanted dressing but didn't want to make it. I couldn't find any pre-made anywhere at Randall's but I ask and a guy went in the back of the deli and came out with some frozen. Fine. The store wasn't too crowded at this time, before ten on the eve of Christmas Eve, but I hope to avoid shopping from now until after Christmas. I bought a few staple things for us: ketchup, Worchestershire Sauce and cocktail sauce. I should have gotten lettuce and tomato and green onions. But FFP went by the store later himself and got these things. He got bananas, too. He thought we'd have too many when he saw I got some but said he'd give his parents some. I said that I had to take some to Dad. It seems we spend a lot of time grocery shopping now that we are doing it for five people in three households.

I did a short workout after dropping off the groceries. I talked to FFP on cells as he was leaving the club for his own trip to a different Randall's.

By the time our guests came, we were both cleaned up and I had set a time to go to some friends' house to get the final housesitting instructions. I've always wanted to take a trip on the holidays...not to have Christmas elsewhere but some 'real vacation'...like cruising through the Panama Canal. That's what our friends are doing. I don't think that will happen for a few years. It seems heartless to leave the old folks on Christmas. As it is, we are going to have to find some extra help for them when we do leave town.

So I'm waiting to go see about the house to sit. We gave our guests some impromptu sandwiches, coffee, soda and fruit and FFP took them to see "The Nutcracker." After I've taken care of the friends, I will see if Dad needs anything else. Later I will meet our guests and FFP for dinner at Fonda San Miguel which is all done up in holiday finery.

But right now I sit here all alone. The house is cool and the weather outside turning cloudy. I'm wearing a bright red wool sweater a friend gave me quite a few Christmases ago. I'm worrying about my dad. And I'm feeling decidedly unfestive. Which seems to have been my theme for Christmas 2006 and Holidailies.